The charm and grace of the southern gentleman is not gone. But it doesn’t have to be exclusive to the South. Sometimes self-control and mystery play in great favor for a man. Speaking well, carrying oneself well, being polite and personable are still “cool.” When and why did being a raging madman or crass maniac become the norm? Rude, snobbish, looking down, shooting dirty looks, not speaking. Have we been diminished to these lows?
I’m a believer that many times these types of expressions are a reflection of the individual himself. If somebody chooses not to speak to you that has nothing to do with you. If somebody up and calls you stupid or fat or ugly or whatever, does that make it so? Of course not, this is coming from some lack in this person’s own life. And being far removed from reality is dangerous; it’s actually a condition. Someone who is that consistently unhappy with themselves, their existence, and those with whom they coexist needs to be addressed.
What do you get out of being rude or making people feel bad outside of a moment of pleasure, a moment of approval? It’s like a high. And you keep doing it and you do it more and more until it has consumed you. And there you have it. Sounds like a condition to me. And of course, with anything in life, you have to make a conscious effort. These innate desires for superiority do not make you a monster. It’s the “not keeping it in check” part that’s the problem.
People always assume that I’m from the South or some far away place or must be a kindergarten teacher or a counselor or a minister or something because I’m “so sweet and nice” and don’t let doors close on people with full arms or because I give my seat to old people on the train or say hello to the person I’m sharing the elevator with.
I’m not perfect or even the nicest (by no means), but I do make a conscious effort to not be the “rude dude.” Being rude and disconnected has become so intrinsically “the way” that people have forgotten that it’s actually not.
Talk to people! Smile! Say hello! We’ve all mistaken for one thing or another, but this week try to be mistaken for a kindergarten teacher and not the rude dude.